Saturday, December 1, 2012

Celebrating with Friends

From experience, all international "transplantation" forces one to find his or her marks. And depending on the destination, it can be more or less easy to do. Making friends is a essential part of the process of settling in. In several instances there is the "visual difference", the possibility to be easily spotted among a crowd, helping locating potential friends. Among a crowd, an eye contact with another foreigner among a crowd opens the possibility of a non-verbal exchange of sympathy (for being in the middle of this pushy crowd, or for being watched, or for having the guts to come out of the typical tourist destinations, for example). However, as Brazilians are so mixed genetically, being caucasians or not no longer stands out in a crowd. Of course, my personal status of foreigner gets immediately noticed when people hear me discuss with my children in a language other than Portuguese. Other "Friend making techniques" are required here in Brasilia.
In Beijing, going down to the playground was a guarantied fast way to find potential friends. Kids playing with kids, moms chatting among each other. But here, in the plano piloto, near the city center of Brasilia, where we first moved in, the playground structures are old, ill-maintained and under-used, therefore not really a "source" for potential friends. And in Lago Sul where we live now, there are no playgrounds easily accessible from our house. Beyond the fact that they are not well maintained and exposed to the burning sun.
So one easy way to meet people is at the school, dropping and picking up the kids. And of course, at birthday parties, as parents are expected to attend.  Slowly but surely I was able to meet interesting friends this way. And here as the circles of expats is to the scale of the city, a friend's friend quickly becomes yours too. And here the expat life gets interesting at night.
So when a friend invited us to celebrate her husband's new forty, in a dressed-up surprise evening, we happily joined, imagining to be a few select to be invited. Here are is a glimpse of our fun evening, where in fact about everyone we knew was!

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